Rebecca Shisler Marshall and Amy discuss a powerful healing tool that can change your life and transform your stories.
Rebecca Shisler Marshall, PhD helps women who have tried everything, to get unstuck, feel better, and have more energy. She is an expert in integrative wellness, certified life coach and yoga instructor, mindfulness teacher/researcher, and nutrition nut. She is the founder of Centered Living and has been an Associate Professor for over 20 years. The Centered Wellness Framework is the basis for her podcast, individual sessions, the Whole Body Upgrade course, and the Centered Wellness certification program for healers.
www.CenteredYou.com
https://bit.ly/WBUpodcast
Rebecca mentioned an episode that describes Seed Moments. You will find that here.
facebook.com/CenteredLiving
instagram.com/centeredyou/
Amy Hallberg 0:00
You know those things that happen, and they stay with you? And then they come up in really funny ways and affect your life and it surprises you and startles you and you don't know what to do about them? Well, my friend Rebecca Shisler Marshall was talking about something called seed moments. And I was like, Oh, I know what those are. And I wanted to talk with her.
You're listening to Courageous Wordsmith, Episode 59. This podcast presents conversation with and for real-life creatives on how we find and keep walking our unique paths. I'm your host, Amy Hallberg. Welcome to my world. Today, I'm talking with my friend Rebecca Shisler Marshall, about seed moments.
So today, I am talking with my friend Rebecca Shisler Marshall. And I'm so excited about this because she, she had this idea she posted on social. And I was like, of course, it makes so much sense that... When you hear this idea, it's like, of course. So we're talking about seed moments. And I'm gonna let Rebecca explain what that is.
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 1:21
Hi, I'm so excited to talk about this.
Amy Hallberg 1:25
Yeah, so let's start with what is a seed moment?
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 1:28
Seed moments. This is something that has kind of evolved over the course of when I'm working with individuals, I could see, you know, I do coaching, I do integrative wellness, I do shamanism and Reiki. And when I was talking to people about, you know, stuff, they wanted to do, things they wanted to do in their life, whether it was change their health, change their purpose, it always seemed like there was, somewhere under 37 layers of stuff, that there was this thing that was driving the belief or driving the action or driving whatever it was. And it usually dated back either to childhood, or somewhere even prior to this life. And so what the seed moment is, is like this, the seed moment when that belief or that idea, or that action originated, even if it didn't show up exactly in that moment. So if someone had a conversation with a third grade math teacher, and the math teacher said, "You aren't very good at math, you go in the Red Robin group," or whatever they used to do. And you took that moment and thought, "Oh, okay, I'm not good at math." And when you're 37, it shows up as a belief that like we were just talking about previously, of maybe, "Oh, I'm not good enough, I don't have that ability, I don't have math skills," it may seem pretty innocuous. But when you go to do your taxes, or you go to start to own your own business, or you take a step in some other direction, that little voice that comes in, that all originates from the seed moment. And the beauty of knowing that seed moment is, we can go back energetically, and clear the energy behind that seed that was planted and help the brain to change. So that seed moment, the ripples, both forward and backward, are no longer present.
Amy Hallberg 3:53
So when I hear you say this, I mean, so a seed moment could be a wounding, but it also could just be a harmless label that maybe even served in the moment, right? It could be something that was actually very positive, but we hung on to it, and it became cauterized. It's not necessarily a trauma. It's just a moment in which a belief was formed. And the effect of the belief is now causing us to stay smaller than we need to be or is somehow causing us resistance. Is that right?
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 4:28
Exactly? Yeah. Because if there's a moment when you were in high school, and they said, "Oh, you're so beautiful. You're just so beautiful," right? Could seem really positive. Could seem wonderful. And then you think, "Well, I'm beautiful." And someone says, "Well, of course you're gonna make the cheerleading squad." Of course you are, right?Because you're so talented, and you're so popular. But then years later, it could actually be limiting you when you're trying to go beyond maybe the surface exterior of who you are and truly trying to identify what do you want to do?
Amy Hallberg 5:00
Who are you? Right? So it can look lots of different ways in that moment, it could be a limiting identity, even, you know, which brings up something that you and I were discussing before we started recording, which is that sometimes... You know, I'm going to I'm going to just share this, I posted something on Facebook this morning about how men went off to war. And then they came back from war and started families and inflicted all the trauma they had onto the children they were raising, right? Or to make it much more innocuous. You're so beautiful, you're a cheerleader, any of those things. Sometimes, we we make those moments almost sacrosanct. Like they take on this, this special quality where we we protect them, and they're holding us back, but it feels sacrilegious. Almost it feels like a betrayal to even let go of those those moments, even though they're hurting us in the present moment.
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 6:07
Yeah, yeah, exactly. Because if you hold on to that, it's a little easier to think of it with the with the girl who's beautiful, right? The girl who's beautiful, and she should always be you know, you should always be in the spotlight, right? And she thinks I have to keep up my appearance. That's who I am. And it drives her to whatever, you know, a series of plastic surgeries when she's 43. Those pieces can become, it's who I am. It's a part of me. And if I don't have that, then what do I have? Yeah, who am I? And you're right, it is it becomes like blasphemy to say something different?
Amy Hallberg 6:53
Well, and it could be I mean, so in the case of the war, it would be this is a veteran, how dare you question service? Right? For example, right. But you know, you mentioned plastic surgery, it doesn't even have to be that. I mean, that's, that's an extreme example, but it could be, you know, what? There was an invitation, and I'm not going to accept it, because I'm not feeling very pretty today. Or, I'm going to go to the party. But I'm going to undercut myself, because I'm not going to show up as if I am so fabulous, because I'm not feeling fabulous. I'm not 18 anymore, whatever that is, right. So the idea, I mean, and for me as as a person who works with story, you know, I just... When you when you shared the seed idea, I was like, that is golden, for people who are trying to tell their real-life stories. Because if I tell you a story about my life, you as the reader are going to be like, why does that matter? Otherwise, it's just a series of events, right? Like, right? What's underneath that? And so, when people are writing about themselves, iit's hard and important to get to what is that kernel of that moment that's causing me to behave in a way that isn't necessarily logical. Isn't helpful. It's, you know, it could be self sabotage, or it could just be an unwillingness to go wherever there is. So you've worked with people, since you came to this idea. You've worked with people? What have you seen open up for people, as you identify these seed moments?
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 8:24
You know, I just love that piece about story, right? Because really, the way that I view it is most of us are walking around telling stories to ourselves all the time. It just depends on what story you're telling yourself. So stories are powerful period, right? Positive, you know, trajectory kind of stories, or stories that are maybe more limiting, right, we all have them. And we all have 1000s of them. I'm the person who... right? Or I am the person who... all of those are stories that we believe about ourselves. And so what I see is that often these stories either are handed right there, they're told to someone and someone says, "Well, that's an authority figure, I'll accept that story." So one of my clients who I just adore, and she's doing this amazing, amazing work of really trying to shift her health. And we went back to the seed moment to clear some of the, you know, with like, a bunch of different stories around food, and around what food meant, and how she interacted with the food. She was told numerous stories about, well, you do this for food, you have this emotional attachment to food that she was like, I do, like, is that true? And she just kind of said, "I guess I like you know, my parents are telling me this. It must be true." When we unraveled that when we saw that emotional point in time when that happened and could address it energetically, right? And also in the mind so that she saw it and then work to create a new belief. She was told, you know, one of the things that she was told us that she just didn't have any control around food. Right? That that was a harder problem. And that she was always going to be overweight. Right? I mean, you could just feel the energy in that. And when we cleared that, what was really interesting is her behavior patterns with food, were a complete turnaround. She is now, she's changed the way that she eats completely. Whereas before, she was like, I can't give up, you know, I have this really sugary snack every night before I go to bed. And I can't give that up. I'm not giving up these foods that are inflammatory, right? That was what she said and was like, okay, so it took a few sessions before we could get to, "Oh, I actually want to change all the food that I'm eating." Right? Because those beliefs were the ones that were telling her that story. Was the one that was telling her she couldn't. It wasn't that she herself couldn't. It was the story that couldn't.
Amy Hallberg 11:21
Right. You know, and as you say this, I think there's a couple things come to mind. One is that, as you said, it's energetic. And I think this is really important. We take words, in our mind to be the ultimate truth. But the truth is that we are animal bodies.
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 11:40
Yes, we are.
Amy Hallberg 11:41
We are we are living in our animal, human bodies. And the same words could be said, but energetically we respond to people, energetically, we really haven't talked about this. I mean, I'm hearing this more and more now, right. But this is not something we ever talked about before, right? It was all about the words, and it was all about the mind, and you can make up your mind. So like, like, like, you could try to talk yourself into a truth. But if energetically, you're not connecting to those words, it's the opposite effect.
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 12:11
Exactly. That's been my experience is that if we just, you know, I started off with just training and coaching. And there is a lot of, you know, let's, let's change the thoughts. And we can get to a different belief system. And I just found some people just couldn't, like, it didn't matter how much they wanted to change. It wasn't about that. And what I found is when I had the training in the energy, when we could go back and clear the energy that was there, not just notice it, not just see it, but clear the energy, meaning, you know, what I see is that there can be energy that other people hand to us that is theirs that come from lifetimes, or it could be cords or connections to other people. And when those are there, it's kind of like, you know, someone ties a bungee cord to you and hooks you to a you know, back of a tailgate, you're trying to go the opposite direction. So when that energy gets cleared, then it makes it so much easier to work on the emotions to clear the emotions, to process the emotions, and to change the story to be one that is beneficial instead of a hindrance.
Amy Hallberg 13:25
Yeah. And that actually brings me directly to the second thing that came to mind which is growing up there were some elder women, not elderly, my elders who really did a lot of damage to me, because they didn't do their work. And so there was that sort of, you know, that the stereotypical hen, right? That busybody micromanage other women, right? Rather than our do our own work. And now that I am approaching cronedom myself, realizing it's so important that we do our own work around this, because otherwise, we are energetically passing this on to our daughters to our sons, to our everyone around us. So you can either deal with the core seed moment directly, right? Or it's going to come out sideways, but it will come out.
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 14:23
Yes, my experience is it does. It's gonna come out some way or another, and you can push it down, and that's fine. Maybe it's not this lifetime's job for you, and someone's gonna have to deal with it. And then it perpetuates that.
Amy Hallberg 14:37
You also talked about how when you heal that when you get clear on it, it goes forward, it goes back ripples out. It eliminates that cause of so when you when you announced this, you actually did a workshop and I this wasn't entirely foreign to me because you and I have some similar trainings, right? But I was like, oh, I want to sit it on this one. And I had to think about as I was preparing to talk with you, I had to think about what was it, because I had a really profound, I volunteered to be coached. And I had a really profound experience about something that happened when I was two. Yes. And an aunt that I kind of thought I had already done my workouts with her. She's no longer in my life on on any kind of real basis.
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 15:26
Right.
Amy Hallberg 15:26
I thought I had done my work. I mean, I was two. So whether the facts actually happened the way that I would recount it or not, what was stored in me was really powerful. And you helped me to move through that. This morning I had to really think about what it even was because, well, what we dissolved. You know, for two days after I was like, "Oh my gosh, this amazing thing happened." And then I didn't know, like that was maybe what, a month or two ago? Like I don't remember. It's gone.
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 15:55
Yeah, it's gone. Isn't it interesting how something that plays such an important piece or role or and then if someone brings something up, we might be like, "Oh, oh yeah. Like I'd actually forgotten about that. Because when it's when it's dissolved, it's no longer this, the story isn't there? Right? It's not being perpetuated over and over again? Because it does, it's like sugar and water.
Amy Hallberg 16:24
And then, you know, I mean, if I do think about it, I'm like, I can have a lot of compassion for that aunt. Yes. Because I look at it and go, "Well, of course, she behaved in that way, given the circumstances into which she was born." Right?
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 16:38
That's right. And that's where the freedom is. That's the freedom right there, is to be able to look at that and go, "Oh, wow, that was really tough for her."
Amy Hallberg 16:47
So this is a process. If people were interested in working with you, they could hire you and go through it. But do you want to just give kind of a sort of an overview of if somebody was interested in this? They wanted to do this, they wanted to identify the seed moment, and they wanted to release it. Some thoughts on just how that works for people?
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 17:06
Sure. Yeah. And I do actually have a podcast episode that talks a little bit more about seed moments.
Amy Hallberg 17:13
Okay. So we will link to that in my show notes.
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 17:15
Oh, yeah. So, you know, basically, the process when someone comes to me, they don't know they have a seed moment, right? They're not like, "Oh, I know, there's this thing from when I was five." They only come to me and they say I'm stuck. Right? I'm stuck in something, stuck in a health issue, stuck in a business issues, stuck in one of those things. And as they tell their story, right, as they are communicating it to me, what I see, you know, I'm usually given from my, you know, I work with spirit guides, my spirit guides will, I always call it poke, right, like, my spirit guides poke me because they will show me images, or really, literally give me a sensation in my body that I feel like something needs to be paid attention to. So that story starts to unravel a little bit. That's not exactly the right word. But it starts to become clear, right? The picture is being painted. And as someone's painting a picture, there are usually body sensations that go along with it, right? There's a tightness in the chest, or a clenching of the jaw, or need or dropping in the belly, something like that. We can use the body as a way to start to point to where that moment in time was. It's like a window. It's a little signpost, of where where to go next. And usually, what happens is we come up with an age that connects to this particular feeling. So if they're feeling stuck in writing their book, right, for instance, if they're having that "I just can't write," you know, "I don't know what's next. I feel like I can't," whatever comes up, there'd be a sensation. And then we might connect that to a time when they were younger, or they're like, oh, this just reminds me of my grandmother or my aunt or something like that. We use what's in shamanism, right? There is no time is is not linear, like we think it is. That's my experience as well as we just step back into time or over, as it were, and connect with that part of ourselves to bring you know, as we were talking about compassion, right? Compassion in that moment, to all the places to hear what needs to be heard, to see what needs to be seen in that moment. Because through that, witnessing, compassionate witnessing is how healing occurs. And with that, then you can bring that healing. When that moment is healed in the past, whether another lifetime or this lifetime,
As you you know, as we've been talking about, it's this ripple effect, that it's not just like, "Oh, yay, my five year old feels better." It's, oh, "That five year old that's within me that I'm hanging out with every day is not going to be the one trying to go write my book. My adult centered me can actually sit down and write." I just feel this nudge to talk about this. So you're a shaman, you don't hide this, or you're not a shaman. You're a shamanic practitioner.
Correct.
Amy Hallberg 20:41
Distinction, important?
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 20:42
Yes. Respect to the traditions from when they came from, where they came.
Amy Hallberg 20:47
But some of these ideas, you talk about time not being linear and things like that. They're not logical. And remember, I've talked about how there's certain things that feel sacrosanct. Like, you can't touch that right, then that goes against some of the faith traditions we've been taught. And so I think one of the tricky things about this, and this is kind of, you and I were talking about this before, how there becomes like this almost cauterization around the wounds, and we're not even allowed to access them, right? Some of the means to healing, you don't actually have to believe in past lifetimes, or linear time not being linear. You don't even have to believe in that. For this to work.
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 21:29
That's right. That's my experience is that people say like, "I don't know," and I'm like, "Well, are you willing to try?" and they're like, "I'll try anything." And then they walk away and they're like, "Whoa, that was unbelievable. I never would have guessed that would have done anything." And I'm ready to go write my book, or, you know, quit my job or apply to this new job, or the 1000s of other things that we don't do. Because there's some little voice in our head telling us. So you don't have to believe in this, in your mind, I think is I think is what I want to get. There's no belief necessary. One of my friends who's an academic, and she was like, "But but but you know, how do you believe in how can you believe in this stuff when you have a PhD? And you're a scientist," and it's like, you know, there comes kind of a choice point of like, if I have magic in my life, it's way more fun. Then going and saying, "Well, that can't be true. That can't be true." I just found that was just not any fun for me. So I would rather err on the side of well, we might as well make things fun. You know, I don't, I don't have the publication literature. But I have the series of case studies that demonstrate like you said, you don't have to believe in it. You just have to come chat with me. Or anyone else that's been trained in it, like Amy's been trained in the first level of the Seed Moment Healing now.
Amy Hallberg 22:56
So what was interesting to me when I first heard it is I mean, that's, that's a favorite coaching tool when somebody's stuck. I'm always like, how old? What's the age? And they're like, "Well..." I'm like, "No, don't think," right? Don't think, right? And this is true in writing, too. "I don't have a story to tell," Okay, don't think, just write whatever stupid thing. And I make a point of like, calling it stupid, like, it's going to be stupid, given. Let's indulge this.
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 23:20
Right, right. Don't think about it. Just pick a number and just go with it. And you can't get it wrong. I think there's this fear of like, well, I'm going to get it wrong, then I'm going to be stupid. And then probably there's a money attachment, I wasted my money, or whatever other you know, like, there's all this stuff that our society really loves a lot. And also, like I said, there was the religious that, you're right, there's all this stuff like, okay. But what if you just just let it go?
Amy Hallberg 23:48
Yeah. And so that age thing is one of my favorite go-to tools every time. Because you because you know, right? There's what your brain is telling you. And then there's what your body says if you if you let it. It took me a long time. Like when I first started doing my training, I didn't feel bodily sensations. I mean, people who write don't, especially because we spend all of our time living up here in the brain, right?
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 24:15
Mm hmm.
Amy Hallberg 24:16
So some of it is like you said, you start to your body will start to guide you in this.
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 24:22
Yes, exactly. And I love that because what you're pointing to, those are all stories, right?
Amy Hallberg 24:29
Mm hmm.
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 24:29
And as a story, how we're supposed to be as a story, right? Societal influences on us are a story. All of those are stories. And if we're really interested in telling our story, right, it can be seen so many different ways. And that letting go is well, what if I just put this story on a shelf just for a moment? I can pick it back up if I choose to. I can pick up the story of religion. I can pick up the story of how women are supposed to be, right? But what if I just set it down? Just for one hour, right? And that's when you're able to set it down in the end, this amazing world of possibilities opens up.
Amy Hallberg 25:15
I love that so much, because as a writer, one of my biggest fears was I don't want to set the story down. What will I write about? And the truth is, when you set that story down, and you do this energetic work, oftentimes, it's the very same story you're telling, right? Just from a different place, and that story is transformed. And that story becomes beautiful. And that story becomes instead of a prison, or for some kind of container, it opens up and it becomes something you can share forward with other people. And it makes a difference for everybody, right? You don't set the event down.
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 25:55
Setting a story down, what a great way to put it. Because I think that's what so many people think is like, they're like, but this is who I am. And it's like, well, you know, like, I went through a car accident when I was in graduate school, right. And I held on to that the story around the car accident and how I had chronic pain, I had all of these things that went on for so long as a result of it. And it's like now that story, like even just thinking about that story that I told myself for so long is so not powerful when it's actually the place that led me to learning more about integrative medicine and learning more about alternative practices. Because Western medicine wasn't helping me. So I had to look in other places. And when I looked at that, when I saw that, like the difference in the story, the event was the same. But my feeling in my body, my perception of it, my empowerment, like so many different things could change, just from the like reframing reframing the story.
Amy Hallberg 27:06
And to bring this back, that then becomes a new seed moment.
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 27:11
That's right.
Amy Hallberg 27:12
For something you actually want to grow.
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 27:14
That's right. Yeah. When that happened, when I saw the change, it's like a little pinpoint gets put in the timeline, if you want to go with the linear thought, of a little pinpoint of like, boop, that that's the moment when, like I can remember very specifically when I saw it in my own life as a good thing.
Amy Hallberg 27:36
Well, thank you so much for being here with me today. Rebecca. It's always such a pleasure to talk with you.
Rebecca Shisler Marshall 27:41
Oh, it's so fun. Thanks for inviting me.
Amy Hallberg 27:44
Thanks for listening to Courageous Wordsmith. Today's episode featured Rebecca Shisler Marshall. You can read about her and check out her links in the show notes. Backstage at Courageous Wordsmith, my editor is the talented Will Quie and my social media manager is the fabulous Maddy Kelley. If you enjoyed this podcast, you can help it thrive and grow organically. Please subscribe right on this page, share it with your friends, and sign up for Truelines, my letter for real life creatives so that you can stay current with future episodes. And if you're feeling called to dip your toes into writing, you might want to join our free writers' Salon. It's over at amyhallberg.com, where you can learn more about me and all my offerings for creative writers. I am Amy Hallberg, and until we meet again, travel safely.